My Unconventional "Love List"

Happy Valentines!

Wherever you're at this year, you are LOVED. You don't need a day to tell you so.

And if you're just totally over mushy-gushy, this is for you.

I wanted to share 3 of my favorite things I'm loving in honor of the month of "romance"...but it's a pretty unconventional list. Stay with me.

It feels like David and I find ourselves always halfway in and halfway out of the door majority of the time.

Some nights we're really great about unplugging and spending quality time together, and more often than not...we struggle to get it together.

7pm and he's wrapping up work, I'm planning out meals, sometimes we're just getting home from the errands we had to run, or traffic we sat in...

By the time we get dinner going, clean the kitchen, feed the dog, clean up the house, shower and get ready for bed, well, it's bedtime!

Can I get an AMEN on this?

*Disclaimer: we don't even have kids yet, so you momma's and daddy's out there- you're so stellar, and all things Superwoman/Superman.

All of that to say, if you're single, dating, engaged, married, or somewhere in between it all- the truth remains: if you aren't investing in it, you aren't growing in it.

THE 3 THINGS ON MY "LOVE-LIST":

1. Counseling- one of the greatest gifts we could have given ourselves during our engagement was for David and I to show up every other week at our church for pre-marital counseling. It really put us face-to-face with hard questions we maybe didn't want to answer, it challenged us to rise to certain occasions we fought hard against, but it mainly taught us grace and forgiveness. I am sad that our society has put counseling in a dark corner where it means only the broken can run to. Counseling is not for the weak- it has so much to offer no matter where you're at in life. As a married couple, we still do counseling and I hope it's a date night we always stick to. There is much to be gained when you invest in yourself- go alone, go with a group of friends, go with your significant other, go with family...whatever needs investing in, take the time to give it some TLC. Psst... having a good friend to talk it all out with counts.

2. Books- the term "self-help" really makes me cringe. It makes me feel like I'm just kinda hopelessly searching for some answers to all my problems and I should find them in black and white pages? Okay well, I'm eating my words this year because self-help books have done me some good.

-The first one I read ever in my life came from as assignment at work- think of it as "a book club for professionals." Chapter by chapter, we dug into Carol Dweck's book titled Mindset. At first, I though yeah yeah have a good attitude and the rest will come... well, it goes a lot deeper than that and I encourage you to read it. It's applicable to Parenting, Business, School, Relationships... everyone can find themselves in these pages.

-The second may be my all time favorite book, ever. The One Thing by Gary Keller has had my brain working for weeks. Why am I flipping out over a book: the chapters are 3 pages short, it gets to the point, there are thousands of examples that just click, and there are so many sentences and quotes I want to hang onto. My favorite so far (in reference to trying to hold it all together and do it all) "Jesus needed 12, but you will need 14." One word to summarize this book: simplicity. If you take away nothing at all from this post except One Thing (ha, punny)- let it be to get this book and start reading.

3. Time- this one is a little vague, so let's dig in. Time for yourself, time to let things grow, and time together with others. You know this feeling: 9yrs old and can't wait to be double digits...12yrs old and can't wait to be a teen...15yrs old and can't wait to drive...18yrs old and can't wait for college...20yrs old and can't wait to buy alcohol...22yrs old and WAIT, whoa, go back...23, 23, 25... and all of a sudden time is flying by and now there's nothing "cool" to look forward to. Now getting older is dreadful, and "getting old is hell." It wasn't until this year that I'm not fighting it anymore. Time is so valuable, you guys, and it's on my love-list because we don't give ourselves enough of it. We are so harsh, so rigid, so gritty, always on the go and always bogged down...it's so silly to waste what little we have on such invaluable things. Best of all, time is free and given equally to every single one of us.

February can be hard, or if could be fabulous.

For some, it's reminders of singleness. For others, broken marriages, relationships, and hearts. For couples, it may feel like an overwhelming feeling of having to plan something special. For you, it may be your favorite time of year because you just love LOVE.

Whatever your feelings- this time of year can be more than Cupid's big show... I encourage you to remember it for what's it about when you take away the chocolates, teddy bears, and candied hearts: Love.

Love putting in time to things that matter to you.

Love your alone time.

Love cherished time with others.

Love significant others, all the time.

Love here and now.

But, for my conventional (and deal seeking) readers out there: here is my short love-list of more traditional valentines gifts and trinkets.

doTERRA Passion Blend- great for setting the mood, making room sprays, igniting the flame

BHLDN Nadya Cami + Shorts- I always love a cute sleep set, and this sweet & romantic one is on sale for $50!

Barefoot Dreams Throw- Cuddle up with this cozy throw from Barefoot Dreams @ Nordstrom Rack for only $50

Groupon- There are so many ideas here! Type in your zip and get all the local deals- couples massages, distillery tours, wine tastings, arts and entertainment events, theater productions, tech goodies, gym and fitness class deals, travel... the list goes on!

I'm sending you internet hugs and love to you all!

Naturally,

Nicki